The All-Or-Nothing Trap

In the early 1900s, two teams were racing to put the first airplane in the sky.

On paper, Samuel Langley had it all. Government funding. A team of elite engineers. Backed by the Smithsonian. His flying machine was a media sensation before it even left the ground.

But when the moment finally came, it crashed into the Potomac River. Twice. Humiliated, Langley gave up.

No more experiments. No more attempts.

A few hundred miles away, in a small bike shop in Dayton, Ohio, two brothers were quietly tinkering with wooden gliders. No headlines. No prestige. Just wind tunnel tests, field experiments, and dozens of tweaks no one saw.

They failed, learned, adjusted. Then tried again.

On December 17, 1903, the Wright brothers flew 120 feet in 12 seconds. It wasn’t flashy, but it worked.

Langley aimed for perfection. The Wrights aimed for progress.

Missing Workouts

I’ve been thinking about that often lately, especially with how I approach my habits.

Take fitness. I used to think that if I didn’t have time for a full workout, I might as well skip it. That one missed session would turn into a week of nothing. I’d then get frustrated at myself for “falling behind.”

But when I finally showed up again, I realized something important:

The workout itself wasn’t just about getting stronger. It was about anchoring my identity. A small, imperfect session still reminded me—I’m someone who moves. I’m someone who shows up.

That consistency matters more than any single perfect effort.

All or Nothing = Fears

The all-or-nothing mindset disguises itself as ambition. But in reality, it’s often just fear in disguise—fear of not being good enough, fear of wasting time, fear of being judged for something half-baked.

We don’t ​procrastinate​ because we’re lazy.

We procrastinate because we’re overthinking—trying to think our way into the perfect plan instead of taking the imperfect first step.

Reid Hoffman once said:

If you’re not embarrassed by the first version of your product, you’ve launched too late.

That line hit me hard.

Because perfection isn’t the path to success. It’s the barrier to it.

Every time I delay launching something—a blog post, a workshop, a new idea—it’s not because I lack the will. It’s because I’m imagining a flawless outcome, and anything less feels like failure.

But that’s not how progress works.

Holding a High Standard for the Process

Progress isn’t built on flawless execution.

It’s built on showing up. Iterating. Reinventing. Holding a high standard—not by waiting for the perfect moment, but by choosing to ​start before you're ready​ and engage even when it’s messy.

And the irony?

That’s how the work gets better.

Not by waiting to be proud of it. But by doing it, again and again, until pride becomes a side effect.

How to Break the All-Or-Nothing Trap

If you’re wired for excellence, it’s easy to fall into the trap of doing nothing when you can’t do everything. Here are five ways I’m learning to break that habit, without lowering my standards:

1. Shrink the goal, protect the habit

When time is tight or energy is low, don’t aim for a full win—aim to stay in the game. A 5-minute stretch keeps the workout streak alive. A quick outline keeps the writing muscle active.

Doing something small ​protects the habit loop​ and reinforces your identity. One push-up is infinitely better than zero. You can always scale up later. But skipping entirely makes the restart twice as hard.

2. Schedule effort, not outcomes

It’s easy to fixate on end results—finish the deck, write the perfect email, close the deal. But outcomes are lagging indicators. You can’t always control them. What you can control is showing up.

Instead of “I must write a great post,” try “I’ll write for 25 minutes.” Time-boxing creates psychological safety to start. It lowers resistance. And the paradox? Showing up for effort often leads to better results anyway.

3. Make starting absurdly easy

​Lower the friction​ between you and action. If you want to work out, lay out your clothes the night before. Want to write? Open the doc and write the title. These small triggers signal your brain to begin.

Once you start, momentum kicks in. Most of the time, the problem isn’t finishing—it’s starting. If you make that part stupidly easy, everything else becomes lighter.

4. Reframe the “partial win”

All-or-nothing thinkers see partial progress as failure. But what if a partial win is exactly what keeps the bigger vision alive? A half-written article is proof you’re thinking and moving. A small turnout at your first event is still a room you filled.

Celebrate progress, not perfection. Ask: “What did I maintain or move forward today?” That question trains your brain to see consistency as success.

5. Default to version one

Whenever you’re stuck, ask: “What does a version one look like?” This mindset flips the switch from performer to builder. It gives you permission to create something rough, testable, and real. It turns your overthinking into output.

Whether it’s a product, a pitch, or a new habit, getting something out there is what unlocks momentum. You don’t need version ten. You just need version one.

Try This Today

What’s one thing you’ve been putting off because you couldn’t do it “all the way”?

Can you do 20% of it? Can you do a rough draft, a test run, or a tiny version—just to keep the chain alive?

Not because you’re lowering the bar. But because consistency is what lets you reach it. You don’t have to do it all. You just have to keep moving forward.